"ASCENSION SYMPTOMS" and breaking free of the disempowering matrix

Figuratively raise your hand if you’re read about ascension or “energy upgrade” symptoms being things like fatigue, body aches, headaches, insomnia, indigestion, etc, and if you’ve had them and felt validated by the posts mentioning what you may feel during these energetic times.

Greetings to you all. This is a very long-winded and weird post. I talk about a lot of different concepts in order to get to my final point, explaining the above concept and the validity of it.

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Musings on the Leo 0º52' Lunar Eclipse

The full moon lunar eclipse is January 20th, exact at 9:16pm pst, when the Sun and Moon are opposite each other in the signs of Leo (moon) and Aquarius (sun).

What makes this full moon a lunar eclipse is that the Moon’s path on its orbit around the Earth is crossing the Earth’s ecliptic around the Sun, thus aligning the Moon and Sun to paper to be in the same position or opposite of one another exactly in the sky. In our current case with the lunar eclipse, we see the Moon clad in Earth’s shadow. The Sun, with its solar consciousness, is illuminating (or attempting to illuminate) the Moon, but we are putting our own Earthling energy in the way, masking the lunar subconscious that is usually present with full moons. Our 3D reality, our humanity, our somewhat limited perspective is clouding our ability to connect with our higher self, with our soular energy and wisdom. And the message I’m getting right now at this moment is that we can pull ourselves further into our humanity in a positive way by connecting to Earth, to our human ancestry, to being BE-ings of Earth.

We have so much history here. In the past 100 years, past 500 years, past 1000 years, 2000 years, 5000 years, 10000 years, 50000 years, and wayyyyy back our history goes. As star dust, our DNA remembers alllll of what has transpired throughout Earth’s her-story. She remembers, and therefore we remember because we are her, we are her divine soul manifested as human consciousness, just as the plants are her, are mother earth, manifested as plant consciousness.  We are mother earth and mother nature just as our plant allies are.

ANYWAYS, this eclipse is sort of illuminating but also sort of casting a shadow on just about everything we’ve been trying to experience and move past in the last 1.5 years. And though it felt “over” since the nodes moved into Cancer and Capricorn, this eclipse is here to remind us that things don’t ever truly end, just like shadow work is never finished. I was talking to a friend and what this eclipse feels like is taking the foot off of the gas pedal, but the car still having momentum. In the last 1.5 years, we really had to put petal to the metal because we were moving uphill. We needed to push ourselves, while also trying to let go of everything that we wanted to control to let the Universe do her thing. **NOTE: that’s because with eclipses, the Universe usually takes over the steering wheel, and engine, and every other bit of the car. The Universe decides to redirect us and radically change external circumstances to teach us certain lessons or realign our path. It never feels good because imagine trekking up Mt. Everest and thinking you’re doing so well because you’ve planned and prepared for this for who knows how many years, then *PLOP* the Universe decides to teleport you into the Mojave dessert. You ain’t prepared for that! You’ve been prepping for Everest for who knows how long and now everything is turned upside down. That’s basically eclipses in a nutshell. ANYWAYS, petal has been to the metal and you really had to give it your all after you were teleported because survival instinct kicks in, but all of a sudden, things begin to align, and you realize you don’t need to push so hard. Ya still don’t have the full picture! And you KNOW that Madame Universe can plop you into the rainforest at any given moment, but this eclipse feels like we finally figured out how to stop being control freaks and loosen up and enjoy the ride a little bit.

Eclipses have been a fascinating occurrence for much of our human history. Our kind has come up with many different mythological explanations of what’s going on, and most of the time those explanations weren’t pleasant. And I think our ancestors were quite logical to go down the pessimistic fear-based route for understanding eclipses (The Gods are punishing us, some demon just ate the moon, the Moon is bleeding we’re all gonna die, etc etc). When things change in a flash we can get quite upset and angry. Of course our human nature will think that things are going awful wrong instead of awe-fully right. We are minuscule ants who often fail to see the big picture. But to get more into the astrological specifics, I like taking to the Vedic astrology mythology of what eclipses are. Very diluted story: Once upon a time, there were some Gods who lost their immortality and to gain it back, they had to drink a magical elixir that was made when they churned an ocean of milk. So they went to go churn the Ocean, and retrieved the elixir. When it was being passed around to drink, a dragon demon snuck in and sat between the Sun and Moon hoping to blend in. Just as it took a sip of elixir, the Sun and Moon realized and ousted the demon to Vishnu, who severed its head from its body. However, since it already drank the elixir, it became immortal and survived but is forever more separated into two halves, the head and the tail. It took revenge upon the Sun and Moon who ousted it, by swallowing them, but as has a gaping hole at both ends, the Sun and Moon are only temporarily “eaten.” And these two halves come to symbolize our spiritual growth. The head of the demon, Rahu, is constantly hungry and wants to feed itself, it’s materialistic and just wants wants wants, but since it isn’t connected to the digestive system, it’s never satiated. Satisfaction never comes. And the lower half, Ketu, is disconnected from desire because it’s just the butt end of the demon. So it doesn’t have that strong urge for seeking satisfaction, but is content to just excrete what comes its way. It represents release and letting go of those materialistic urges. The north node is Rahu, and the south node is Ketu. North node — all the things we want to gain and have, where we’re seeking growth and newness, what we’re moving towards; south node — what we need to release, what we’re moving away from, but what can spiritually support us.

With the nodes being in Leo and Aquarius, we’ve had the need to move away from feeling supported by our peers, looking for external validation, wanting to blend in, wanting to support and be a part of something bigger than ourselves, and we had to push towards finding our individuality, our unique voice, what sets us apart, and doing what we deeply and truly want for ourselves, not what we think will get us outside approval. And while that has shifted in November, to Capricorn and Cancer, this eclipse reminds us that the energy is still there. The new internal structural support systems that we discovered or built for ourselves are still in the process of being manifested. Things aren’t finalized, but are a constant progression of effort.

Uranus is making a square to the eclipse from Aries. And Uranus won’t be in Aries for very much longer. It moved into Taurus, and retrograded back, and will be moving back into Taurus in March and won’t be back in Aries until 2095 when we’re probably going to be dead (unless we learn how to maximize our DNA and live to be much older than our recent predecessors). Uranus when it forms positive aspects feel great, it’s innovation, inspiration, creativity, magic. When it’s a hard aspect, it feels like we’re a snake shedding our skin but somehow we’re clumsy and it got stuck and we can’t figure out how to get out of it. It feels like things don’t feel right, like we gotta make a change asap, but we don’t know where to go or what to do. And impulsivity, one of Aries strong suits, isn’t in our best interest right now. Being impulsive won’t serve us any favors. And yet we have the impulsivity itch scratching at us and driving us bonkers. Just gotta ride it out until clarity decides to settle. 

And we still have the Jupiter Neptune square happening in Sagittarius and Pisces, though it’s not as exact anymore, but Venus decided to pop in and join the club. To me at least, this square felt like mental health went down the drain, and I know many other people struggled with their sanity and emotions when the square was exact. Jupiter ruling our sense of faith optimism, and sense of a bigger picture clashed with Neptune who is also a spiritual planet but represents our connection to the divine, to our higher self, to the magic beyond the veil. Again, positive aspects to Neptune are great; they mean profound spiritual connection, feeling divinely supported, unconditional love, rainbows and unicorns, etc. When Neptune is in a harsh aspect, the magic is cut off and surrounded in densely polluted and congested fog. Spiritual senses are cut off, it’s like you’re blindfolded looking for the light at the end of the tunnel. Finding the end of the tunnel is hard enough but blindfolded just makes a whole lot messier, because there’s no sense of moving forward at all. And Jupiter expands everything it touches so these feelings were intensely amplified for the past week.

If you’ve been emotional, it’s okay.

If you’ve felt lost, it’s okay. 

If you’ve wanted to give up, it’s okay.

These feelings won’t last forever. Change is coming. You just gotta sit tight and try not to drown or suffocate in your tears until it arrives.

I’m right there with ya. Right now the energy is just building building building and the Moon is in Cancer, so emotions are up the wahoo. And the Moon was just in Gemini from the 16th-17th so mental anxiety was up the wahoo.

Read for your Ascendant/Sun signs to see where this full moon is activating and illuminating your life. 

ARIES | creativity, hobbies, romance, pleasure, children

TAURUS | family, mother, home, real-estate

GEMINI | communication, siblings, local travel, self-expression

CANCER | possessions, assets, value of worth, money, self-worth

LEO | the self, health, path in life, identity, goals, desires

VIRGO | spirituality, charity, isolation, release, confinement, imagination

LIBRA | social circles, organizations/groups, hopes & wishes

SCORPIO | career, recognition, achievements, public image

SAGITTARIUS | travel, higher education, spiritual beliefs/philosophy

CAPRICORN | loans, taxes, personal transformations, joint finances, rebirth

AQUARIUS | relationships, business partnerships, clients

PISCES | health, wellness, fitness, daily routine, job

Info on the distance group reiki session is posted in the comments of the Eclipse instagram post.

December Tarotscope

The tower loves to haunt me, as it’s one of my tarot birth cards (the other being the Chariot). And it called out to me when I was shuffling, but I ignored it, so it decided that it just HAD to come out. Thanks, spirit.

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But first, we have the 7 of Wands. And I especially love the depiction of this card in this deck, the lone flame burning with all others cast aside. In my very first deck, the 7 of Wands was portrayed by a shy girl hiding behind a large and solid tree — insecurity. And in other decks, the imagery is typically a man standing among his opposition trying to stand his ground, but with off footing, struggling to keep his place. But to me, this bright fire shouts: Security! Confidence! Pride! Self esteem! It shows a flame that is able to stand among its “opposition” by lighting itself, by shining brightly. And opposition then turns into others that are cast into the light. Light casts shadows sure, but it also illuminates the way for others to see. So this month, my message to you is to shine brightly in yourself. Do what you love and set your soul aflame. And in doing so, you also illuminate a path for yourself, you connect to spirit, and clearly see what you want to do as well as how you’re supposed to get there. And all else will be shoved into the shadows, out of your way.

But seeing that Tower card, we also have the message of risk! Of leaps of faith! Sometimes we gotta jump and leave all that is no longer serving us behind. This card makes it seem like New Years is coming a bit early this year — we need to be willing to take that risk, to start new, with a fresh perspective, rather than lugging our baggage behind us. We need to leave the past in the past to be able to follow that little light of ours. And that is scary. We humans become attached — attached to possessions, to ideals, to beliefs, to labels, to our perception of reality, our perception of our SELF. We need to rebearth ourselves into a new creation, a new life, just like Earth is rebirthing her self into her new reality. We need to be willing to take that step along with her, and in doing our part, we help her transition as well.